Persuasion by James Borg
Persuasive speakers use three different types of proof: ethical (character and reputatoin), emotional appeal, logical. Teh best persuasive messages strive to blend all three to achieve the goal of moving people from point A to point B.
Man's inability to communicate is a result of his failure to listen effectively, skillfully, and with understanding to another person.
A much-cited (!) study by Paul Rankin on how much time people spend in various types of communication showed interesting results. Consider how much the average person did the following in a typical day: Listened 45% of the time, Spoke 30%, Read 16%, Wrote 9%.Others cite it, must be important/correct. ;)
if I sense that somebody isn't listening, I'll throw in a statement relating to a fictitious scneario. The responses are often quite amusing, ranging from "Oh, how awful" and "Oh, really?" and "What happened?" Other people actually "listen" and respond with a smile or laugh as the words sink in.
We talk at between 120-150 words per minute. We think at a rate of 600-800 words per minute...
the listener is always ahead of the person doing the talking.
Don't finish someone else's sentences
Don't talk over another person
Don't offer advice too soon
Paraphrase their words
Interviewer: Okay then... if you could have dinner with someone, living or dead, who would you choose?
Candidate: The one who is living, definitely...
It's up to you to look for the signs. You can tell by the person's eyes and expression whether his or her mind is elsewhere. If you know you've lost that person's attention, it's better to stop.
The average person looks without seeing, listens without hearing, touches without feeling, eats without tasting, moves without physical awareness ... and talks without thinking.
the work done by psychologists over the years continually puts an average figure of around 40 to 45 percent for the verbal part of our message (which includes teh way the words are said -- what's termed paralanguage) and 55 to 60 percent for visual body language in a typical face-to-face conversation with another person.